Translated from the original by Costas Balomenos
What kind of prologue you can do for someone, which she confesses the “depths” of his soul? What kind of prologue you can do for someone, who “fell in love much”? What kind of prologue you can do for someone, who does not care whether it shall use in her speech “as should” expressions, so as not to be misinterpreted by several Pharisees and hypocrites of the society? What kind of prologue can you do - you, a petty bourgeois conservative teacher of religious - for someone who does not hesitate to admit that “I never cared for crumpling as a man, because always I was listening to my heart in matters of love”. Just, clam up and leave the other to narrate you the pain and the unjust, which drowns her...
Postscript: At the end of the article there are explanations for some expressions of Elpida, because Elpida uses the phraseology of Jehovah's Witnesses, which is unknown to the general public.
Note: The Greek word Elpida, in English is translated as Hope.
Follows the “deposit soul” of Elpida
am Greek, from Chania of Crete and my name is Elpida. In 2007 I went to fix up my shoes in a central store of Chania, where were repairing shoes and there I met a man, named Tassos. Initially, I went to the store twice and the third time I went back, I asked him if he has into account a home to rent, because then I was looking for house. In the conversation, he told me that lingered in a nice area of Chania and I told him to have his mind, if he finds something good to tell me. Besides, for this reason he asked me my phone. After a week he called me to give me some phone numbers of some houses that he had been found. I thanked him and the discussion stayed there, but after two days he asked me officially to get out for lunch. I accepted and somewhat so began our history. Then, when I met him, he was gone from the Society (the last 10 years), namely he was about 28 years old, while I was two years older than him. From the age of 18 years was lacking from the Society, when in the course of our relationship, he told me what he had done in his life all these years and I understood how much psychological pressure was accepting even into his house, where he was continuing to live with his parents.
We stayed together for two years, during of which we did everything is making a normal couple within a relationship, i.e. excursions, companionships, amusement, everything. Tassos started to open to me after a year, we were together. He started saying to me that in these 10 years, he was cut off , he could not bear the pressure and as a child - who was - it was not permitted to do anything that makes a child of his age. When was excised and for 10 years he thrashed all, he did relations, he was coming out, he was sitting up late and he smoked a little. Also, because the early years his parents had flown him out of the house, he was staying with a cousin - who also was cut off - in a subterranean apartment, and he did whatever job was found in order to survive. After three years they took him again at home and so he was continuing to live with them, without giving them many rights. As long as we were together, many times he was leaving his house because his parents were inviting many brothers  for dining and - of course – he could not be there. So whenever this was becoming, we was spending all day together and then - when everybody was gone – they were calling him by phone to turn. The situation was tragic, then I could not understand many things, because of course I did not aspect of their doctrine. The only thing I was seeing continuity it was that for as long as we were together he was happy, was laughing and suddenly watched him to fall into melancholy and I could not understand why he was reacting so. I could not figure out the – of supposedly - reminder which they did him every day, when he was returning home, that sometime he must to see what he will do. To point out that his father was an Elder  and when Tassos left the Society, of course they removed his privileges, something that did not like to his father because he lost his chair in there.
The first two years, my relationship with his family was very good. They worshiped me and especially his mother. With his father I did not have many, because I do not you hide that from the first moment I saw him and he looked at me, I saw the dirt and hypocrisy that he was hiding in his gaze, and it does not need to be in the truth  to understand the dirt of a man in his gaze. When you're on your own a net man, you understand it immediately. He also had a sister, who she had been married one thence into, her great love - as she was saying. At least she got someone who loved him, though - in general - the girl was living and lives in her own world, “in her bubble”, as we say.
Well, with all that, spent two years, then suddenly one day he says that decided to make the effort to join again. This has meant that we had to split up, which of course both we did not want, because longer loved each other. I did not know anything in what concerned the reintegration, namely that passes a period, in which is starting to watch gatherings, he have to be typical and impeccable, so-called theatre as it was evolved in the course from his side, because his reintegration lasted seven months and then they accepted him back. So then I tell him that I want to start a Bible study . He did not want to put me in this process, in no way wanted I make such a move, sole purpose to be together, because in my path will was coming out otherwise ... Thus, he was seeing this always.
So I phoned in his cousin, who then and now that we talking was a sapper , and I started the study. I started going to church, in which was going his sister - while he and his parents were in another church - not to give a goal - so on the first 4 months that I was making study and he was making reintegration, we had normal sexual relations. After I began to change, I began to have the so called pangs in approaching God, i.e. that I dupe him and that all this it will come out a boomerang to me, if I was continuing to dupe the world and God alongside. So I tell him that I do not want to sleep with you again, I want to continue my study and he his reinstatement and if you all goes well we discuss it later. Of course he did not want to “lose the egg” but what could he do? He was seeing now that I had started and I was learning everything about his religion, I began to judge him, because I was seeing that he was not keeping anything from what he was saying and he was going to the gatherings just to “counts hours”.
So, another year has passed and we arrived at 3 years. Well, after a few months, I had begun the study and sometime they were reintegrated him longer as an official member of the church, and here “they started the organs”. His father often began to bring brides at home to pick his son. Constantly was organizing tables in his house, from which they were paraded whole the church. To emphasize that the guy – i.e. his father - of course and he did not wanted me for bride, he was seeing that I had already been evangelized , and I was getting ready for my baptism. And then I understood this reason when by other brothers then I ascertained that all these years his father had done many things. One of them was once, that he was accused of parallel relationship with a sister, who he did her study. The whole issue received enormous dimension and it came a Committee  from
 of . In
the vote that became,
the result was 2 against and Athens 3 in favor. Then of course, “in minimal time” as they say, the girl who “he was
taking handful”, took care to marry with the son of a family friend and so 'are
being covered up' the story. “Fickle” the father - as
we say - and all the years were many times when the secularists  they had seen him with other women, but the guy
had been operating a system, having “solutions” to everyone. During the discussion i.e. - between funny and
serious - he did the other one to reveal things he had done, which he will was
using these subsequently. If someone was coming to make recommendations in him, he was taking
care to remind in everyone theirs going astray. Thus, he had all of us “with envelope” and nobody went to “denounce” him in
the presbytery. So he could to move as it wished all the years there and he
continues until today...
And since when they started the dinners with the brides and Tassos seemed to be uninvolved in all this, always was keeping a communication with me, through his sister to know in what situation I am. So, in September, i.e. 3 years ago, I was baptized  now officially. At the day of my baptism had had a crisis, and watched him in the video he did like a lion in the cage, he was about to burst. On that day, his family welcomed me within the circles of the Society - I was their sister now - regardless of whether in the course, was soon made evident the theater, which we all had played in recent months.
After two months and by waiting to see when he would tell me to we make acquaintance - based on what I was seeing and who almost everybody were waiting this to do - because everybody knew that longer I walked into the Religion, I learn from a sister who phoned me the followings: "Because I have received much mockery in my life, and I do not like see to mock good people like you, you must know that Tassos makes acquaintance with another woman." What to tell you how I felt? All I did then was to send him a message and tell him that “I know everything, no need to mock me some more.” He came immediately to my office, because we are close and told me that - about - all these apply. “Ha, ha, ha what ridiculous”, I say “about I make an acquaintance, about I get married and about I have sex .... Go away and you do not come back here”, I said, “we finished”. He began to cry and was telling me that he put his logic and did his heart aside. I said “what logic since all are now tidy, nothing prevents us to not be together. Go away”, I repeat, “and always remember whenever you see me that you will be the most dishonest man I ever met. Remember this.” So, it became and he left ... Plus, I had take a decision, I knew there was no way not to marry this acquaintance, simply because he would not make a slip again to humiliate his family ... The situation was finished.
After a few months where I had lost
8 kg I lost weight too,
I had to face my pain, my family which was
opposed to this
whole situation. Luckily my
friends - despite all the decisions and changes I had done - they
stood me up to the
end, but now I had started to arrive in the early stages of
depression. That One was continuing to make his acquaintance. Every
time when was finishing the assemblage and I was seeing him, the picture was
dramatic and one of us, only that we was not crying, and how I could understand
that his father had done all this. To point out that the new bride was a little girl 20 years old who had come
from Sitia, to Chania. She was 10 years younger than him and she had achieved in TEI, here in Chania. She was from
a divided family religiously, her mom and her sister were in the truth, and
moreover her mom had put them into the Society. Her father and brother were out
of them all, it was a poor family and mum was a cleaning lady. Then, when
I learned some things,
then I realized that all these did her mom with the father of Tassos,
because the woman believed that her daughter found the lottery of
her life, as long as Tassos was a highly sought after bridegroom due of beauty and of money. So - as you understand - his father wanted a girl not to knows, not to
understand and not to leave, if his son made “some dirt”. Where
to go after, this little girl penniless? So exactly was the mother of Tassos, when she married his
father, she had not “fate in the sun” and was tolerating the horns of her
husband all these years. Of course the little girl never finished TEI.
To note that the bride was not born in the truth. She had get into the last two years and became immediately a sapper woman, so the whole “packet” was than it should, i.e. Tassos to getting a woman with spiritual level to help him in its path.
Now I was starting to fall apart. So, after all this frustration, the hypocrisy, and the theater that I received from him and his family, I decided to go to the presbyter of my church and tell him that all of this I can not support it anymore. Actually, I started to wake up a little, but one that woke me up and I realized how wretched are the most - not all - because I met really and nice people, it was when the presbyter turned to me and said, “that if you leave you'll never be happy and that you will be miserable in the outside world”. This was! «Τhe switch came down ...». I said, a man who leads a church said to me this thing, he who continuously was speaking only about love - as long as I was there - turned and said me those words!
So, I left slowly and subtly. I was not excised ever, until today They consider me as an inactive  member. During the first 6months they were bothering me for a little, but then the calls were stopped. Naturally then, in August, Tassos married. Then, from a friendly couple to me, with which we are known and they had an affinity, I learned that - as long as he did the acquaintance - he was going and with other women to satisfy his carnal pleasures, and continuity he was speaking about me and was crying who lost me.
The marriage became thus. After the wedding, his father took care to send him to the
of Moshato ( Attica), where he is the last two years up to
now as we speak. Of
course he is not
working and his father feeds them. I learned that
he did all this to keep him away from
me after the wedding and to enable it to be alone with his wife to her become accustomed. What
say! A week ago became and the marriage of the children mentioned above – i.e. my friendly couple who told me about Tassos. At their
wedding I went and me. These are Orthodox Christians, but it was invited all
his family and he with his wife. We all they noticed, who had got up - in front
of the dance floor - and was standing and was looking at me with folded hands.
Every time I see him in the last two years, as was done a week ago, has always this look of remorse and pain. Still I feel - whenever he sees me - he loves me. I feel it because we experienced very strong moments, but I understand and weakness that is as man. You see, he grew up with this way∙ to fear God, to fear his thoughts, even the air that breathes. A man who never paid a bill, who never worked, in whom they had not been given responsibilities never. Nothing of all these. A pawn that never raised his head to live the life he wanted, as he was saying to me. And what did he want? Freedom in his life, this he wanted.
After the wedding - other day - I sent him a message for the first time in two years, because I was feeling so. Always I was telling him how I feel, I did not care never be wrinkled as a person. In matters of love always I was listening my heart. So I wrote to him, I understand that still he loves me, every time he sees me ∙ that there was no reason not to be together ∙ I am not expecting anything, i.e. to split and come to find me. Sometime will understand that all the prohibited and of religion, god will never imposed it in order not to be together. Of course he replied me that he still loves me, he apologized because treated me so immature then - God, what a stupid excuse - that never to feel the pangs he had felt for all what he did, and he considered right for me and for him to make this choice. Of course he made the choice without ever to discuss it with me. Also he told me that if I get back to the truth I will be happy that only there I will find the happiness. I did not expect to tell me something else, and he told me the “classic cassette” that all say, and that it is no good for us to talk, and that I don’t know what he went through to get all these decisions.
So the story ends here. I forgot to mention that when I lefttherefrom into, I did four months psychotherapy and I managed to find again myself. A year ago I did a relationship that lasted for nine months, but we broke up because he woke up one morning and he thought that he does not know if he is ready for marriage, while for eight months “had reached out the frumenty on the table” and he was telling me about weddings and festivals. In any event now for a year, I am on my own and I understood many of them all.
Certainly I learned what it would say love, but rather one-sided, as human being I broke my limits towards my family, to my friends, to myself. I risked all to be with a man who I thought he loved me, for a man I would give my life for him, so I felt everything all about me.
But I also saw another world, a world who is misled, really - such as says your book  - better not ever wake up, let us continue to live in their error. For many therein brainwashing is great, and is soaked up to the bone. Unfortunately I still have a couple of girlfriends there, where they say me how they feel alone. Especially one woman of them could not bear and at the age of 35 years she went with a man, and from her joy she had not where to say it and she called me to the phone ... I’ve tried many times to talk to her, is listening to me, but is afraid. You see all her family is Jehovah's Witnesses, does not have fate in the sun - as they say - and as she says it can not do anything, just she is with one foot inside and the other outside.
How it hurts me all this, I wish I could talk to him, but I do not have the required knowledge and experience to make him understand, lest and wake up. On the other side I say that God knows what is doing, nothing is random, everything is a cycle, all are spun, at least in my 33 years I have seen this, those who they have hurt me they turned and they apologized from me. Their life brought it so that at some point they realized what is hurting a man. Βλέπετε ο πόνος σε αλλάζει, είτε προς το καλύτερο είτε προς το χειρότερο, αυτό όμως που δεν ξέρω τελικά ποιό είναι; To get married a man and try to love him as he did? He who speaks for God's crisis, he does not know that God sees better than anyone your heart and your motives? When the time comes, what would you tell him? I left a girl who once I loved her and I married another because my dad chose her? You live happy subsequently with such a choice?
Plus, the only thing I want is can love again, to find a man to live this life. I'm tired seeing everyone approaching me just to have good times. Luckily now I know to recognize such behaviors and do not I am entering into procedures. I want a man to share feelings, moments and a family, a man looking at me in the eyes and to see that he loves me.
Every night I pray for all these, always I did it and before I met him. Prayer is my refuge, the most beautiful time of day, the hour I talk to him. Certainly you know that God has no labels, has not discrimination, is only love, and I believe that he knows how to distribute this love to everyone.
Thank you for reading. I hope my story be an example to others....
 be "cut off ": The Jehovah's Witness coming in “quarantine” (isolation) from the organization mainly for ethical reasons but also of teaching. Friends and his relatives did not shall address the reason to him, unless it is necessary, as for example if they live in the same house. Anyone JWs conversing with “cut off” repeatedly subject to sanctions.
 brothers: So, the JWs are calling each other.
 presbyter: Religious dignitary of Organization of Jehovah's Witnesses.
 I am in the truth: Expression using among the Jehovah's Witnesses, to show they belong in the organization.
 grafical (biblical) study: the dialogical discussion that is conducting a Jehovah's Witness with someone on issues surrounding God and religion based on some printed matter of the Company and who to support and prove the correctness of his arguments, invokes passages (pieces) of the Bible.
 sapper woman - sapper: So is called Jehovah's Witness who is employed exclusively to the promotion of the preaching of the Organization, not occasionally as the others JWs.
 the evangelizing: The Jehovah's Witness who now has the possibility to preach the teachings of the Organization from door to door. Are divided into baptized and unbaptized.
 committee: When a Jehovah's Witness blamed or fallen into serious misconduct, in order to establish if this happens, being interrogated by a judicial committee, which decides on his cut or not.
: Hebrew word meaning “House of God”.
The Jehovah's Witnesses call so the head
office not only in Bethel but also around the world. Greece
 secularists: The Jehovah's Witnesses they call all of us so, who are outside the Organization. Another endearing expression for us is “Philistines”.
 Baptism: The baptism of a Jehovah's Witness has no connection with ours. As indicate theirs brochures are the conscious public declaration of someone that would dedicate his life entirely to the service and implement of the will of Jehovah - God (in fact of the Company “Watchtower”). Many Jehovah's Witnesses remain unbaptized although they are in the organization for many years. One such case is Onesimus - the columnist of “antiairetikos” - former JWs, who although born from parents Jehovah's Witnesses was not baptized ever.
 inert: So is called the Jehovah's Witness who ceases to deal with the organization and he not go to gatherings, nor goes to work of preaching from door to door.
 your book: she means the book “Seeking the Truth” by Nikos Mavromagoulos, a former Jehovah's Witness, which describes his life in the Organization. Nick Mavromagoulos is he - together with others - who created the famous website OODE. As Elpida informed us, she sent the above letter and to Nikos Mavromagoulos also.