Translated from the original by Chris Tsilikas
How Jehovah’s Witnesses imagine Armageddon
If a person who is
not aware of the Society of Jehovah’s Witnesses “Watchtower” happens to open
one of their leaflets, he/she will certainly be amazed by the way the Society
deals with all spiritual issues. Because he/she will find out that they deal
with them in a materialistic, garrulous way. Even God is not exempted from such
attitude. For instance the Society takes
all the anthropocentric expressions of the Holy Writ – that is, expressions
that have human beings as their centre –
literally, and as a result they are led to incredibly wrong, extraordinary
conclusions which a lot of times reach the levels of comic...
That’s why, on the one hand, god is sometimes
presented by the “Watchtower” as a simple creature with some supernatural
powers, and on the other hand, his almighty is withdrawn and he is presented as
a powerless creature that cannot give immediate solutions to human problems,
and needs time to solve them.
All chapters of the publications and of the leaflets
of the Society of Jehovah’s Witnesses are fraught with such descriptions which
refer to the war of Armageddon or Harmagedon. A war every Jehovah’s Witness
anywhere in the world lives and breathes for, since he/she is convinced by the
Society that it is then that justice will be rendered, with the annihilation of
the evil people, meaning the people who are not Jehovah’s Witnesses, and the
survival of the good people, that is Jehovah’s Witnesses only.
Before
we get to explaining what Armageddon is, we have to warn our benevolent readers
that what they are going to read about will not only sound incredible, but they
will also get to the levels of comic. However, this is not our fault. We just publish everything we managed to
‘fish’ from the leaflets of the “Watchtower”.
Anyway, this is what happens to anyone who doesn’t
walk in life along with God’s Spirit and deals with everything in such a garrulous
and materialistic way.
WHAT
ARMAGEDDON IS AND WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN DURING IT
The word Armageddon derives from the Hebrew expression
“Har-magedon” and it literally means the mountain of Megido.
It is referred to in John’s Apocalypse, chapter 16, verse 16, “And he gathered them together into a place
called in the Hebrew tongue Armageddon”.
Megiddo was a city of ancient Israel and it was the place where
decisive and bloody fights took place. This is why this expression is metaphorically used to represent the
fight between good and evil during the Day of Judgement.
Jehovah’s Witnesses however take this fight literally.
They believe that canons, tanks, aircrafts, etc. will be used against Christ by
the nations which according to the Society of the Witnesses are evil!
Yes, that’s right! We’re not pulling your leg!
Remember we have warned you. Of course, even the “Watchtower” itself
understands the implausibility and the ridicule of the whole situation they
describe, so they try to calm things down by saying that due to the fact that
human weapons cannot reach and hit Christ in Heaven, they will be turned
against his followers down here on Earth, that is, Jehovah’s Witnesses.
But there’s a point where they do not even try to calm
things down at all, but they speak literally, and this is about the way the
attackers will be dealt with by Christ.
The ridicule of the description in the “Watchtower” is more than enough:
“Their tongues will rot out!... they will be blind!... sinewy warriors will
lose their strength!... the electric systems of the high tech weapons will go
bad and miss their targets!!!”
You wonder where you can read these entirely
ridiculous things. Do we have to give an answer to that? In the official
magazine of the Society, the “Watchtower”, of course. You can find all these
mentioned above in the “Watchtower” of
October 15th, 1975, pp. 637 and 638:
“Of course, the nations cannot reach up to heaven and attack this city,
but they can attack those on earth who represent it.
Either their tongues will rot out, physically, or they will fail just as
though they had no tongues. Powers of vision will suddenly go black! Muscles
and sinews of highly trained, physically developed warriors will lose strength
and movableness as they stand on their feet. Their arsenal of weapons,
including computerized missile guidance systems, will go bad.”
The “Watchtower”
of October 15th, 1975, pp 637 & 638, The nations will attack Christ and their tongues will be rot out and
high tech weapons will miss their targets!
And the freak of the war of Armageddon never ends. Wherever we, the non-Jehovah’s Witnesses
want to hide, we’re for ever lost. Neither the mountains nor the caves, not
even private submarines can save us! Jehovah will search every nook and
cranny and he will find us – the “watchtower” has managed to turn him into a
hound – to give us, according to the “Watchtower” what we desreve.
HE WILL SLAUGHTER US TO MAKE OUR BLOOD OOZE!
And
what was our crime? We didn’t become Jehovah’s Witnesses! ‘Enjoy’ all the above in the “Watchtower” of November 1st, 1967, pp 659-660.
“If, as it were, they should go into the mountainous region of Bashan and onto its high peaks, from there the
inescapable Jehovah God will bring them down and back to punishment. If, even
in atomic-powered submarines, they should try to hide themselves in the depths
of the sea, the unavoidable Jehovah God will bring them back. To what? To face
slaughter, that their lifeblood might be poured out.”
The “Watchtower”
of November 1st, 1967, pp 659-660, Christ will find us even if we hide in submarines in order to slaughter
us!
And listen to the contradiction now. While we will be
suffering all these by Jehovah, the God of love: having become prey for wolves
and wolverines after so much blood we will have lost, Jehovah’s Witnesses will survive in safe places, content not only
because they were saved but also because of our slaughter! And such cruelty
comes from people who are supposed to love us! And the cruelty becomes even bigger if one thinks that among the people
who will be slaughtered, there will be parents, children, brothers and sisters,
spouses, and other close relatives who were not lucky enough to be Jehovah’s
Witnesses. Well, they should have been careful! Anyway, the “Watchtower”
does not ask too much from its followers. Only to distribute its magazines “The
Watchtower” and “Awake” and once you do this you will find salvation in
Armageddon!
Well, up to now, you may have wondered how “The
Watchtower” knows when exactly Armageddon will break out and moreover how it is
possible for them to find the time to warn all Jehovah’s Witnesses that
Armageddon is imminent. But as you can guess we have no answer. They will
probably have cable or digital communication directly with God. Anyway, they
must know better.
Due to the fact that the leaflets and magazines of the
“Watchtower” are fraught with photographs depicting happy Jehovah’s Witnesses
surviving Armageddon, we decided to present the one that is published more
often. It’s from the “Watchtower” of February
15th, 2001, p 16:
The “Watchtower” of February 15th,
2001, p 16, Happy Jehovah’s Witnesses,
survivors of Armageddon!
AFTER
ARMAGEDDON
So, let’s say that Armageddon is over. Have all our
problems finished? Not, at all. It’s now that they start. And the first and
biggest problem is that of the corpses. As we all know every war has its
victims. Especially during such a war which covers the whole Earth. So, there
will be billions of dead bodies. What is going to happen? Jehovah’s Witnesses
who have survived are not enough to bury them all. So, they run the risk of
disease spread. An immediate solution must be found. And it is found indeed.
You wonder what it is; but, ‘Deus ex machina’, of course.
According to the “Watchtower”
of June 1st, 1973, pp 345-346, God will use…highly scientific means he has at his disposal, to clean
the earth from the corpses! And we thought we had heard it all! But we had
never heard of a Scientist God
before.
“But the animals could never dispose of all those slain at Har–Magedon.
Hence, the Almighty God will doubtless use some highly scientific means at his
disposal to get rid of the surplus of the decaying bodies in a speedy and
sanitary way.”
The “Watchtower” of June 1st,
1973, pp 345-346, God will clean the
earth from the dead corpses using…scientific means!
The next problem is the resurrection of the dead.
Because according to the Holy Writ all the dead people from past years and
centuries are going to resurrect. Therefore, there will be a problem of
overpopulation on Earth since they need to stay somewhere as the “Watchtower”
supports. How is this problem going to be solved? Don’t worry! The “Watchtower”
who has a phone link directly with Jehovah has found the solution to that. The dead people will resurrect with…a priority
number! Yes, that’s right. We’re not kidding. According to the “Watchtower” of April 15th, 1973,
p 246, they won’t resurrect on a twenty-four-hour day, but gradually. Wait for your turn! You’ll all take
Resurrection! There’s no need to urge and shove your way through the queue!
16 “Bear this fact in mind: “Hell”
will not disgorge all its dead at one time, on one twenty-four-hour day, thus
producing a bewildering population explosion for the relatively few God-fearing
survivors of the universal war of Har–Magedon. “
The “Watchtower”
of April 15th, 1973, p 246, The
dead people will resurrect gradually!
Yet, there is a point where the “Watchtower”
disappoints Jehovah’s Witnesses. And this point is the issue of marriage.
Unfortunately, the “Watchtower” of October 15th, 1967, p 638, points
out that Jehovah’s Witnesses won’t be able to marry their old spouses again.
But, due to fact that as we have said a lot of Jehovah’s Witnesses protested,
the “Watchtower” let hopes arouse that something may be done since Jehovah is
great and he is aware of the needs of his loyal servants. You see, they don’t want to lose their delivery boys because otherwise
who is going to deliver the magazines “Watchtower” and “Awake” without being
paid?
“Many faithful servants of God who look forward to living forever on
earth and whose mates have died would like to have support for their hope that
they could be reunited as husband and wife in the resurrection. While not being
callous to their sincere feelings, we must admit that apparently Jesus’ words
apply to the earthly resurrection, and they indicate that those resurrected
will not marry or be reunited in a marriage relationship with former mates. “
The “Watchtower” of October 15th,
1967, p 638, Resurrected Jehovah’s
Witnesses won’t be able to get married to their old spouses again!
And now we get to more trivial problems to which,
unfortunately, not even the “Watchtower” has the answers. Probably their phone
link is out of order, who knows! Or they might have all the answers but they
have thought that they should deliberately keep a few things as a secret so
that there is a hint of suspense. Well, what do you think?
Of
course, to be honest, the “Watchtower” says that they don’t have the answers
because there is nothing written about these trivial problems in the Holy Writ.
But the fact that Jehovah will clean all the dead bodies using scientific means
is written in the Holy Writ, indeed. Where exactly is this written? In their
imagination, of course, where else?
Let’s discuss now these trivial issues which will
bother the survivors Jehovah’s Witnesses and the resurrected dead after
Armageddon. First and foremost, we have to clarify that according to the
“Watchtower” there will be total destruction and wilderness during Armageddon
and no human creation will remain still on Earth. You won’t be able to
communicate, because there will not be any telephones, there won’t be any
airplanes and cars to move around, no…electrical appliances such as cookers and
washing machines, no new clothes, no…hammers or…nails to build houses, nothing
will be there as we know it today.
How
can all these problems be solved? It’s very likely that Jehovah will use his
scientific powers again and give a solution to these unsolved problems.
And as a last problem we have left something that will
unfortunately disappoint the wine lovers all over the world. Unfortunately,
after Armageddon there won’t be any spirits for consumption. So, hurry up!
Drink as much as you can now, before Armageddon breaks out! And after that, you
will stay sober for ever, with no alcohol at all. Not even a beer for the hot
summer days.
8
“True, the prospect of a genuinely new
order excites wonderment and many questions easily come to mind. For example,
some ask, ‘In that new order, who will supply all the services the present
worldly systems have been providing? If all the present systems end in the
coming “great tribulation,” how will the survivors communicate with one another
around the earth? With mail, telephone, telegraph and radio systems gone, how
could there be any unified direction of activities, as by an earthly governing
body serving under the heavenly kingdom?
9 Still others wonder about transportation methods then, whether there
will be automobiles, airplanes or other such powered means of travel. Among
feminine questioners there may be more concern as to whether such conveniences
as electric stoves, electric washing machines and similar devices will be
available. And, for that matter, what about really fundamental things, such as
clothing? When the clothing or shoes one is wearing at the time of survival
wear out, where will new ones come from? Or if one wants to build, where will
one obtain such things as hammer, nails, saw and other equipment now supplied
by the systems of this present order?
11 as a
possible survivor into the New Order. The absence of an alcoholic beverage
industry would not prevent this“
The “Watchtower” of June 15th,
1973, pp 361 & 367, No planes, no
electrical appliances, no nails and hammers, no spirits after Armageddon!!
And a piece of advice for our beloved Jehovah’s
Witnesses: To play it safe, hide a bottle of beer somewhere, just for the
difficult hot days awaiting you after Armageddon!
Writer Christos Pal
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